| When Alice Weatherspoon fancied a bit of
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| | tree. In 10 years of fishing that stretch
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| fish for her tea, she didn’t go to
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| | of river Alice had never even seen a
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| the fishmonger’s or the chip shop,
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| | warden, but she knew the type.
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| she went down to the river to catch her
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| | ‘Excuse me Madam, could I see your
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| own. Mind you if the river warden were to
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| | fishing licence?’ the man asked.
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| catch her fishing without a licence it
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| | ‘And who might you be?’
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| would have cost her a pretty penny, the
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| | ‘I am the river warden and you need
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| fines were ridiculous and could be as
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| | a licence to fish here.’
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| high as £2,500.
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| | ‘That’s alright then,’
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| It would have been an easy job for Alice
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| | said Alice. ‘I’m not
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| to get a licence, but she refused too on
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| | fishing.’
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| principle. The Environment Agency issued
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| | ‘But, you have been Madam and that
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| the rod fishing licences and since she
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| | is an offence, and liable to a
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| was a trout tickler and didn’t own
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| | fine.’
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| a rod, Alice refused to pay for a
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| | ‘I didn’t know that, but
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| licence. She learnt the art of trout
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| | it’s OK since I haven’t been
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| tickling from her father when she was a
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| | fishing.’
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| girl. Her father had learned it from his
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| | ‘If that’s the case, Madam,
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| father, who had turned to poaching as a
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| | why have you got two trout in that
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| means of feeding his family, during the
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| | bucket?’
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| strike of 26.
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| | ‘Ah them, well, that one is Mavis
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| Well, last Friday Alice made her way down
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| | and that one’s Mary they’re
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| to the river Wear, bucket in hand, to
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| | my pets and I bring them down to the
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| catch a bit of fish and unlike Lampton
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| | river every day so they can get some
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| she wasn’t after a worm, she was
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| | exercise.’
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| after a nice pair of trout for her tea.
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| | ‘That is the most ridiculous thing
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| Her mother had been a regular churchgoer
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| | I have ever heard.’
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| and despite Alice’s lack of
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| | ‘No it’s not. What I do is, I
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| interest in organised religion, she
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| | tip the fish into the river down there,
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| always had to have fish for her tea on a
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| | take a walk up there, until I get to the
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| Friday.
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| | bridge, then I put the bucket in the
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| Her favourite pitch was upstream from
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| | water, tap the side with my stick and
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| Penshaw, on a quiet stretch a few yards
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| | Mavis and Mary swim back into the
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| beyond the bridge that carries the A182
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| | bucket.’
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| across the Wear Valley. On reaching the
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| | ‘I don’t believe a word of
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| spot she half filled her bucket with
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| | it,’ said the warden. ‘You
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| water, rolled up her sleeve and lay on
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| | must think I’m stupid.’
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| the bank with her arm in the water. An
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| | ‘Look, I’ll prove it to
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| hour later her patience was rewarded as
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| | you,’ said Alice and she tipped the
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| she scooped out the first trout and
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| | trout into the river.
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| placed it in the bucket, twenty minutes
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| | ‘Right,’ said the warden.
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| later the second one joined the first and
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| | ‘ Now, lets see you get the fish to
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| she was ready to leave.
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| | swim back into the bucket.’
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| Picking up the bucket, she set off for
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| | ‘What fish would that be?’
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| home and had gone no more than 50 yards
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| | Asked Alice innocently.
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| when the warden stepped out from behind a
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